I believe in Harvey Dent
I believe that Harvey Dent is the fresh breeze of integrity that we need in our halls of justice. A man of character and honour, Dent has proven himself time and time again as a stalwart defender of the public interest. Dent has an impeccable record in sending the enemies of our society to prison, while providing a much needed bulwark against our out-of-control judiciary. For these reasons and more, Dent is our man for District Attorney of the greater Boredomistan precinct. Dent.
I know what you're thinking. I'm not political, how can I drive change? I'm just a man on the street, what impact can I have? You can rise up and vote for Harvey Dent, your partner in prosecution. Say no to crime. Say no to corruption. You have a voice, and you have the power. You.
The system is broken, but why change? What can Harvey Dent do that countless others before him could not? Corruption rots down from the very top, and our judicial system is ripe with decay indeed. How can we have faith in our lawmen when they are only out to look after their fatcat corporate buddies? Don't turn to the police, our newspapers are filled with anecdotal evidence of our officers on the take. Harvey Dent offers a safe harbour from these malevolent forces. Dent understands your well justified fear in our authorities, a fear that he has dedicated years of his professional life to vanquishing.
Rest assured, Harvey Dent is no 'suit'. A man of both the law and the community, Dent has earned a fierce reputation as a tireless campaigner for a better society. An impressive man with an equally impressive heart, Dent is just as much at home selling muffins at the local school fête as he is in sending the scum of society to prison.
So when you go to cast your vote under the innocent gaze of our children, give special consideration to the choice that you are offered. Will you vote for establishment, corruption and fear, or will you take the brave step and vote for hope, change and decency?
I believe in strength. I believe in progress. I believe, in Harvey Dent.
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What kind of muffins? If he's a pumpkin seed and all-bran pusher, i want no truck with him, it's blue berry or bust! It's like i always say, you can't trust a man made of malign muffins.
But srsly, wtf? If this was sarcastic it's gone over my head, having no idea who you are ranting about. Is it an east-coast thing, or am i just out of one more pop-culture memetic loop?
Only suckers vote. It's all rigged - The Man doesn't really listen to the people. We live in an oligarchy - money rules. What would happen if no one voted? The system would be revealed as the sham it is and the people would rise up and take the power back. Don't be a sucker - don't vote!
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